Bad Mommy!!!

I know I keep saying that I will up-date more often... and its not like there is a lack of things to up-date about... SO much is really going on in our lives... thus why i have not had time to update!

Well Happy New Year... Merry Christmas... umm what else did we miss... I have no idea... so I will try to write in order of events... but it prob won't happen the way it should!

First as I have stated before I was worried about Grayson and his lack of talking... he has in the last month started to sign more again and says "oh" for everything... he gets his point across even if he doesn't talk... well I brought this point up to the pediatrician and he recommened we get him tested with the state (Early Childhood Intervention) and to see a Neurologist! Well we have started the ECI testing to see if he will qualify for that... and we saw the Neuro! At the appointment they did some testing in 4 categories.... Social(hold eye contact, smile) so he passed that... Gross Motor (standing, crawling, moving) so since he was running all around no probs there... Fine Motor (pincher grip, hold crayon) and since he is advanced and uses utensils to feed himself and hold a crayon correctly not in a fist he passed that... and last Speech (he should be saying 8-10 words be it sign or verbal, and pair up words -- ie hi momma) he is ranging about 5-6 months delay since he does sign/say 2 things... but he does not pair sounds when he babbles... does not say anything that he thinks he is talking but I just don't understand.... so he is having a pretty severe delay... at his age the Neuro normally wouldn't be concerned as he is still young... but since he used to say more (momma, dada, dog, milk, bye... I know there were more now I don't remember... short term memory) So... he is going to aggressive on his stance... we will be starting very aggressive speech therapy of twice a week for the next 6 months... we will be seeing the Neuro again in 3 months to see if he has had any progress BUT if he has not had any progress he will do more testing (MRI/CT) but for those he will have to be sedated and I would rather wait! Also, today we are going back to the ENT for another hearing test to verify that it is NOT a hearing issue!

Can I lie and say no I'm not worried it will all be ok... sure I can... but I really have NO idea... Do I want to find problems where there are none... not really I would rather have my happy go lucky baby without worries... but since as soon as I think all is good... it seems that we are thrown a curve ball... I think we will always have something... but we will see!!!

Christmas... it was good... Grayson got way too many toys... I have no idea where we will put everything... I need to be cleaning an organizing... but as always I am not!!!

New Years... lets hope that year goes better than last... I feel that this year will bring lots of change lets just hope that it is for the better!

I will add pictures later!

A few up-dates

Well as always I am a bit behind… that is what happens being a single momma that works like crazy and in my free time I actually like to hang out with my little dude… and not just write about him… ha ha!

Well lets see…. Since it has been SO long since I last wrote… I really don’t remember what all I wrote! I know it has been a while… so I will just write and if I repeat… well oh well!

First, Grayson is still as always the love of my life and my pride and joy! He makes me smile when I REALLY need it as there has been a LOT of stress in my life as of recent… but that will come later! As always even when the kid is sick and is running a super high fever and throwing up he still smiles… so I am tryng to continue acting like him! It is an uphill battle that I am not winning right now… there has been on more than on occasion that I find myself in tears and I have no idea what I am doing… and at times it is even with Grayson…

I have never written about depression… or anything… and I don’t know if I would say that it is true depression that I fell is just being overwhelmed with emotion! As I have stated before I am single momma… I have an awesome supportive family that I would not be able to do anything without… but at times I feel like the black clouds are over and I have no idea what I am doing! Am I raising a child that will be well rounded? Was I wrong in doing this alone… am I wrong to think that I can handle this without a man? With the delay in Grayson’s communication skills I wonder if it is my fault… because it is just me an him at night at home am I not talking enough thus he doesn’t get enough verbal stimulation… he doesn’t know where anything is on his body except his eyes and I think that is just a lucky guess… he doesn’t know how to count… or his A,B,C’s… have I put the wrong things at the front burner… is it my fault… is it cause I get him up at the butt-crack of dawn to go to work… then once we are home it is a few minutes of play… then dinner… which am I feeding him too much… not enough… I don’t know… then it is bath time… and bed… am I a failure? Yes my child can walk, and crawl, and jump, and clap, and LOVES to dance! He is the happiest kid when his momma is around… but am I failing him that he is delayed?!? I know, you should not judge a kid based on what other kids his age is doing… and I really try not to… BUT when he is 16 months and STILL will not wave and a 7 month old is waving to him goodbye… there is something wrong with that! Yes he is the strong silent type, he is not a push monkey that you can FORCE him to do something… he will not do it… he is hard-headed just like his momma… and is that a bad thing?

Oh I know everything happens in time… you can’t force them to do what they don’t want to! BUT I wish he, and when he starts to back talk me I know I will be kicking myself for forcing and wishing he would hurry and talk… BUT it would be nice if he could communicate better so I knew what was going on… and what he was feeling…

Well I started to write this during my lunch break… and this afternoon I ended up taking Grayson to the doctor… so he could get his booster for the Swine Flu… and since I have to pay a co-pay if I just get the shot… or if the doctor checks him out… I went ahead and had the doctor do a once over and make sure all was well health wise AND to talk about my concerns about the speech delays… SO he is having asthma issues… which I knew would happen cause of the crazy weather… cold in the morning hot during the day and cold at night… it does even get to me… but his lungs are clear… so we are just gonna up his “rescue “ meds for a few days and get him over the worst of it… and hope that the weather makes up its mind… ha ha… we do live in Texas… he is having an eczema outbreak on his back… could be caused by anything… but I got some cream for it… his ears are clear… thank you Lord… and we got the flu booster! Also, I stated my concerns and he looked back at his and some of the other pediatricians in the groups notes from the last year… since it is a group and I have seen them all at different times and he agreed that it is cause for “some” concern, nothing that is an emergency BUT something worth looking into, BUT could be nothing… SO we are now waiting for the insurance company to give a referral for him to be have a developmental testing done… and a hearing test… the developmental testing is what I was hoping would be done JUST cause I am hoping to have my mind put at ease and for them to tell me all was good with him… or so that we can start getting the help that he needs… and the hearing test is just as a precaution, Dr R wanted to make sure that the reason that he stopped talking is not cause he is having hearing issues… since he has had ear issues… it is more of a precaution than something he really worries about!

I think the main reason I am concerned about Grayson and his speech is just the fact that I had speech issues, and still have some now! I was lucky that my elementary school had an excellent speech therapist… but I think if the state had the programs that they have now… I would have been better off… but oh well… so now I know about the different programs and I want to be ahead of the game… and so we are now getting Grayson tested just to be on the SaFe side of things! I just don’t want Grayson to have any disadvantages in life if I can help it!

Well as I said before Grayson is getting bigger… he is now in 18-24 month pants and 24m-2t shirts! He also finally has started to gain weight… thank God! He now weighs 25 lbs and 5oz… woohoo… I thought the boy had hollow legs… thankfully he finally he gaining weight… I know I don’t want him to be over weight… but when he dropped from the 75^th percentile to the 25^th percentile in 4 months made me a little worried… not the doctors… cause he is still on the charts and he is healthy… but I always worried if he was eating enough… drinking enough… whatever… yes I still worry… I think I will always… even when he is a teenager and eating me out of house and home… I want him to be happy and healthy! Is that too much to ask for?

Lets see what else… his new party trick is he climbs on anything and everything… he is into EVERYTHING he should not… he can finally drink out of a straw… he loves to color… my little artist… and play with legos… he also LOVES to dance… it is so funny we will be out shopping and if he hears a song that I sing and he enjoys… he will raise his hands up and start to dance… it is the cutest thing… sometimes we draw a crowd… but it is still REALLY cute!

Lets see what else… well… Im too tired… I will load some pics… so enjoy…

Crafty weekend...

Ok... I have been trying to be crafty for a while... and even though these pics didn't turn out as well as I would have liked... I think they show enough...

I have been working on tutus and bows for a while for my niece... now I am gonna try to attempt to sell them... if I can find anyone that wants to buy them...

I wish I had a little girl... cause I love doing these little crafty things... I wish I had more time to do it... but eventually I will... please enjoy these pics!!!

I will up-load pics of the boy tomorrow and give a better update!!!

Life and Trials...

Well so so many things to talk about... lets see if there will be enough time... I hope to post pics... but don't know if that will happen...

First life is more crazy by the minute... we have been going 100 miles an hour... with little end in site at times!!! First Grayson has had an on and off again cold the last few weeks... I know what's new on that... well nothing... it just calls for some long nights... and lots of snuggling!!!

Well as before... we are back on call for work... not as bad as last month when it was 9 days... this time it is only 5 days... but once again... Grayson is sick... I swear the kid doesn't want me to be on-call... every time he ends up sick I swear!!! I am hoping that tonight is gonna be a better night... so fingers crossed... momma is pretty pooped waking up at 130 and working all day... and then back on-call for the night... blah... but so far he has been able to keep everything down for the day... so here is to hoping!!!

Well after 15 months... and lots of heart ache... today was a big step for us... Grayson had his last bottle of breast milk... my freezer stash is officially gone!!! I am SO sad...I mean Grayson still nurses when we are at home... and at times I wonder how much longer... I just don't know if he is still getting enough from me... but he enjoys it so much and when I do tell him no... he gets very angry... so looks like we still have a while on breast feeding... but at school he gets 2 glasses of soy milk (thank you lactose intollerance)... and when he is home he nurses!!! I am sad that today was his last bottle... but also excited cause he is getting older and more independent!!! I am SO glad that we were able to make it this long... I knew it was something that I wanted desperately to do... and from the time that we started... I was nervous and scared that it wouldn't work... and I knew I wanted to make it a year... and when I went back to work it was VERY hard... and then when I was told I had to quit pumping after 3 months back at work it was the hardest task I have ever succeed at... that one I was able to keep my supply up enough to feed my child and was lucky enough to have a great start of a stash that when things started to get hard and I stopped pumping at 8 months... cause I just didn't have the time or energy... I knew that it was in God's control! I was lucky that my mom was very hard headed when the hurricane hit and I almost lost my huge freezer full of milk that she was willing to go and wait 2 hrs for a generator... just to save my milk!!! Now when we had a power outage and the freezer was tripped and I lost a good 500 oz of milk right after I had decided to quit pumping... I was heart broken... but decided that what was meant to be would be and I knew that I would continue to breast feed as long as possible and if needed I did still have my pump so I could always go back to pumping if needed to make it to the first year...but well as I said before... we made it 15 months... almost 16 months... so I think we have done well!!!

I know I have said before and I will say it over and over again... and sorry that I am SO off what I started this post for... but I will just be on this soap box a little while longer...

Breast feeding was something that everyone says come naturally... and is the best thing for a child... and for the mother!!! Well after seeing my sister struggle with both of her kids to try to breast feed... I knew it was something that I wanted to do... and I was going to do everything possible... but if it didn't work then I knew formula was always an option... and kids still grow big and strong and smart as can be on it!!! I went to every class possible to learn to breast feed... I met with the lactation consultant 3 times while in the hospital and Grayson in the NICU... I went to the local La Leche League meeting the following week and got a lot of really useful information from those ladies... and I ended up joining a new mommy group... that was women that had kids within 2 months or so of Grayson... and everyone was breastfeeding.... we got to do weight checks weekly... and met with the lactation consultant for free... and she helped so much... Lori is the beast Lactation Consultant... she helped me more than she could ever know by one listening to me when I was pregnant and scared of BF not working... she was also my sister's LC through all her trials... and then when she put this group of women together... they really helped me with everything!!! They are a group of women that are strong independent... but also very like minded... they listened and gave advice... they helped when needed... they gave me mommy friends... when I was alone with this new little guy that I had no idea what to do with really!!! I am so thankful that I BF because it gave me something to have in common with these women that were all married and had planned this pregnancy... unlike me... and it was nice cause I was able to give advice on things I learned and had tried!!!

Another reason that I LOVE BF is that it made Grayson and me SO close... as a person that never thought they could be a mom... I think that BF gave me the closeness that is needed to be a parent... and I hope that it will continue to keep us close even once we are done and he grows up!!! I love knowing that he depended on me and me alone... but it also was a burden when I just wanted to sleep... and I wanted someone else to feed him... I knew that in more than one way it was JUST ME... yes I was single mommy... but I was also food... me and me alone... ha ha!!!

Also... as an added benefit... as last month was was Breast Cancer Awareness Month... yup I am delayed... as an added benefit for me... BF lowers my risk of Breast Cancer... and since I am pre-disposed to breast cancer... yup my Bunny (Grandma on my momma's side) passed away from breast cancer... I will do what I can to prevent... and since it helps to breast feed... it all works out in the end!!!

OK off my soap box...

Well Grayson has been making VERY nervous... first... he has always been ahead of the game on gross motor skills... he has hit every milestone... before time... or right on time... but talking... especially with a momma that talks as much as I do... he doesn't talk... he used to... he would say prob about 7-8 words... now nothing... he does babble... and he knows how to get his point across... but no more momma... dada... dog... nothing... he hits enough of the milestone that the pedi is not stressed... but since he was such a social little boy... and I can tell he is going into a shell at times... it does make me nervous... no we have no history of issues... no family history of autisum BUT with all the talk out there... I just don't know what else to do!!! So... we are in a waiting game now... have to wait till he is 18 months!!!

Lets see what else... Grayson is growing bigger and bigger every day... he gets beat up... well bit at school at least once a week... I would hate for him to start biting back... but at the same time I wish he would cause then maybe the biting may stop I hate having boo-boo reports!!!

Well we just passed Halloween... Grayson was a cowboy!!! I knew that I didn't really want to waste the money on an actual costume... I knew that I just hated to waste 30-40 dollars for a one night dress up... yes as he gets older I am ok with it... I don't mind spending the money... I just hate wasting the money... SO since Grayson doesn't mind wearing hats... I got a cowboy hat... then I bought some cute boots that he can wear through the winter... and helped make the outfit... then he already had a cute western shirt and some Levi jeans... and you have a cowboy... well I did forget the red handkerchief... that really helped make the costume... oh and the stick horse... he was bigger than he was... but he enjoyed that silly stick horse... so cute!!! Well Halloween my mommy group had a little party so one we could all see each other... so hard to do now that we are all back at work... and two cause the kids are really too young to go trick or treating... it gave us a reason to get them dressed up... plus it was SO cute seeing all the kids walk together to the different houses and get candy... well the other kids got candy... Grayson didn't... I am just not ready to start that yet... I know silly mommy... I let him have cake and ice cream on occasion but NOPE no candy!!! Grayson had so much fun just walking with his friends... he didn't even know he was missing any thing... ha ha!!! Then after the party we came over to mom's house and sat in the cul de sac and had a little neighborhood party that all the kids ran around in circles!!! Way too much fun!!!

Well as most people are aware the H1N1 is out there and it is not a cool thing to get... yes people are doing better with it... but since I work in a hospital I hear all the horror stories of the flu... and well we had 4 patients not have happy endings from the H1N1 flu! It makes me very nervous... I know a lot is the news going above and beyond... BUT well it is scary!!! Yes Grayson was diagnosed with the flu back in August/September some time... I can't remember now... but I still don't believe that it was the flu... I think it was a fluke that he actually tested positive... he never had the flu symptoms... he just had the high fever... then he was diagnosed with Roseola... and I think that is what the fever was all about!!! Well where I was going with all of this... There is now a vaccine... and it has only been around well not that long... not very much research has been done on it yet... now for me to get the vaccine... well no brainer... I work in the health care field and I am more than likely to be exposed to it at some point during the day... so for me to get the vaccine... no prob... which arm would you like to put it in... ha ha!!! Well the Galveston County Health Department was giving away the vaccine over the Halloween weekend... so of course I was all there... well they were giving it to children also cause they are in the high risk group... and with Grayson's other health and pulmonary issues I knew it is best if he gets the shot... but with not enough research behind it... I was very nervous!!! Luckily the medical director was a doctor I used to work with many years ago at St.John's hospital... and he reassured me that Grayson should be fine... there is no guarantee... but then again there are no guarantees in life... so in the end Grayson did get the first of 2 shots... hopefully there will be shots available in a month for his second shot... but I know that he needed the shot... so I will leave it in God's hands and pray that he keep my boy safe... and not have any of the nasty side effects!!!

Well I am pooped... I want to up-load some pics as I have SO many REALLY cute ones of my man... BUT I need to go to sleep!!!

Maybe tomorrow!!!

Good night!!! Sorry I got off on so many soap boxes... and to ramble... that is what happens when you don't post but once every few weeks... and you have so much to say...

Long Time

Well I have fallen down on my blogging duties... SO much has been going on... we have just been SO busy!!! To begin... Grayson had all of his testing at Texas Children's that tested for EVERYTHING lung related cause he was still having breathing issues... and everything came out great!!! He tested negative for a few different diseases that we really didn't think were possible but since he was not responding to the medication Dr F wanted to just check! He tested positive for a few different allergies... fingers are crossed that he will grow out of them... but only time will tell!!! Also they did immunity testing and he has a very STRONG immune system which is good... doesn't explain why he seems to get sick SO often... BUT also explain why when he gets sick he gets REALLY sick!!!

Well as I have stated before with my job I have to be on-call... it makes me very on edge cause I never know if I will get called in or not... and thus I have to stay at my mom's house! Well to this month I had to take 8 days of call and thus I tried to take them all at once which meant I was at mom's house for 10 days... I did get stuck at work last too many night... many more than I really wanted and I did get called in a few times... yet overall it was not that bad... but it did make me VERY cranky... and to top it off I was sick as a dog ALL week!!! But now my time is up so I am free for the rest of the month... then next month we only have to take 5 days... so that makes life a lot nicer... I will be done with call the first week... and then I am free for the rest of the month... so hopefully with me not being on call I will be able to update more often again!!!

Well back to the fun part about my life... Grayson...

As I said before we have been spending quite a bit of time at my mom's and with being on call it was hard to make it out to the pool cause I had to carry my silly pager so instead we spent many nights out in the back yard with the slip-n-slide and a splash pad that we bought Grayson at the end of summer sale at Target! Pics are at the bottom of the page! Grayson thought that was SO much fun he just loves playing in the water and has even more fun with the kids in the water... I liked this better than the pool cause I didn't have to put on my swim suit cause yes the water was deep enough technically to drown BUT we were right next to the pool and he was happy!!! So that is one way we spent a many of nights at mom's! Also mom bought a few months ago a blow up ball pit and of course cause it has just been taking up space I decided to get the air compressor out since I was doing a bunch of NOTHING at mom's other than wait for the silly pager I pulled out the ball pit... can we say so much fun!!! Grayson loved it cause hello there are balls in there and the kid is ALL about balls... well balls and cars! Avery loved it cause well she got to act a fool... and there were balls to throw at Aiden and all over the house... and of course Aiden loved it also! There are of course pics of the kids playing oh so well in the ball pit!

Next... a few weeks ago was the Pasadena Rodeo... this was the beginning of my call for work so I was nervous about going... plus of course a as it never fails the nasty weather came to town... but we decided to face the nasty weather and enjoy a few hours of the rodeo... it was cold and wet... but so much fun! It has been a while since I last went to the rodeo... I would say prob when I graduated high school umm 7 years ago... so it was nice going back! Plus we went to see the animals... it was Grayson's first real experience with cows and pigs and goats and what not... And the verdict... Grayson does not like smelly animals that make scary noises... so once again proves he is my kid... ha ha!!! He was ok as long as the animals were far far away... but when we got close to take some pics... the tears came and the screams started! Also as I said before it was rainy and cold and wet and gross weather... and as anyone from texas knows this mean... not a good thing for the allergies!!! So from Friday the 2nd of 8 days of call I lost my voice and got really sick! Oh the joys!!! But overall the rodeo was lots of fun... I can't wait for the Houston Rodeo... Gray will be older and I think he will enjoy it a lot more!!!

The following day was my nephew Ty's Birthday party... they had a moon walk... and the whole family was there! It has been since January at a family member's funeral that I last saw most of them so it was GREAT getting to see everyone! Grayson was of course on his best behavior into EVERYTHING... but really stayed away from the moon walk... he would try to get in a few times... but since most of the time there were older, rougher kids in there... when it would clear out I didn't want to put Gray in there for fear of not getting him to come out when the big kids would go back in! Well at any birthday party there was cake and of course Grayson enjoyed the cake... he loves him some cake! And at the end after a costume change... and most of the kids had left... I finally put Grayson in the moon walk... he liked it... but couldn't figure out what to do! So of course Mommy came to the rescue... and my big butt got in... and bounced with the silly kid... and of course Avery then had to come over and jump with us... and then another really cute little girl came over and jumped with us... so my big butt that is WAY out of shape... is trying to jump with 3 little kids in a moon walk! So much fun!

The next week of call went as above... we ran the streets played lots and spent family time together!

We have been SO busy... and Grayson is just getting more active by the day! He is into everything! Happy as can be... only is becoming more like his momma... and is so graceful... he falls or trips and has numerous bangs and bruises... he is just like his momma! Oh well it is getting late... there is more to talk about... and share... but it will have to wait... many more pics to come... and stories... just too tired tonight!

Grayson eating like a big boy!!!

Well Grayson is getting SO big! We have been working on his eating skills and some days he does REALLY well other days he is a little on the LAZY side! Tonights dinner was beef ravioli, green beans, water mellon, and yogurt! I normally just dump all his food on his tray and let him go to town and when we are home it is not that big of a deal cause we are home and he has a tray to eat off of! Well when we go out to eat there is typically not a tray so I have to lay the food on the table... kinda gross if you ask me... do you know how dirty resturant tables are... yes they wipe them down... but it is with a towel that they put in a bucket that they fill with minimal cleaner at the beginning of the day! Ya so lots of germs... I have tried to do placemats... the thin plastic ones... he just pulls right up... I did get one that has a little catch tray that works pretty well... but when he gets bored or is done he starts to pull and try to make a HUGE mess!!! Well you ask... why no use a plate... cause like the tray... he does fine when he is eating but as soon as the boy is done or bored... he is not getting full attention... there goes the plate faster than you can react!!! SO we have been stuck to using the dirty nasty table that yes I typically wipe down prior to his food with a few baby wipes... but what is there to do! Well over the last few weeks I have been working on using a plate or bowl just to introduce it while we are home... and I can't be embarrased when he drops a whole bowl of mac and cheese or green beans on the ground cause well the dog normally eats it before I even have time to go get the broom and mop! We also have been working on our silverware skills! No he is not perfect at it and still uses his hands to eat... but it makes him feel like a big boy when he gets the food on the fork or spoon and then he actually gets it into his mouth! Well here are just a few pics from tonight! Him with his HUGE grin! He sees the camera... and can't help but grin at it! Such a little brat... but I do love him!!! I do have pics of him actually getting the food into his mouth but for some reason blogger really doesn't want to load those pics... oh well!!! The last pic is of him after he took a big bite and the face he makes is just priceless!!!

Also... I think we may be turning the page on Grayson doing things in public! For the kid that LOVES to show off and is just the cutest thing ever and love to smile and chat with people... he does NOT perform on command! It was said that he was delayed by his daycare cause he didn't know how to wave... and some other things... but well he will not do it on demand... he is not a push monkey! Well I was a little worried cause he was SO social and at the same time he was not! He never met someone he really didn't like and was always all smiles... so the reasoning behind social! Well up till a few months ago he really didn't say ANY words... he would babble and I would guess you could say that he somethings but I never could make out any! He slowly has started to say more words but still would not really say anything in public! But he is slowly working into more words in front of people! Well over the weeks that we started at his new school I have tried to get him to wave bye... and well he is just not interested! I mean I see babies younger than him at the store that you wave at them they wave back and and say hi... well not my kid! Well we have now been working at giving hi-fives as a good bye gesture! And it seems to be working! Well this weekend every time I said bye to someone he would wave and blow a kiss... how great is that... and the person that we were saying bye to actually saw this!!! Woo hoo!!! Also... my great kid... when he would do something good that you normally would give a hi-five for... in congrats... Grayson has been going and picking up my hand and then hi-fiving it! It is SO cute! The kids is SO smart! He also is signing so much! I can't believe that it is clicking and he can communicate so much better! Yes sometimes he is still in melt down mode... and I try to get him away from the problem and get him to tell me what he wants... or I try to speak and sign everything that we know so that hopefully he will start signing or telling me what is wrong before he is in melt down mode but it doesn't always work! But at least we are taking steps in the right direction!

My boy and sign language!!!

Grayson is now 14 months old... such a big boy! I am just in awe of how much he has changed in the last 14 months it is truly amazing!!! He teaches me every day! First let me say I am now spending my days trying to act more like him... cause no matter what is going on... how he feels and how much he may or may not want to do something he is almost always happy... yes he has his meltdowns and temper tantrums but no matter how sick he may be he will smile the biggest smile that will just melt your heart! Well I have been having some rough times at work and really not liking where I was at and the people that I had to work with and was ready to hide in a hole! But after being off for 8 days and being able to spend a lot of quality time with my main little dude it reminded me that work is a means to an end I may not like it but the more miserable that I am the worse the day is and the longer it turns out to be! Well when I came back nothing had changed people where still rude and hard to work with but I decided I no longer wanted to be that person... I wanted to have a smile on my face work and do whatever was asked of me... and when the day is over I am done till the next day and just look forward to my days off that I can spend with the little guy! Well I can tell you I do not resent this place near as much, I am not coming out of here just steaming, and it is actually not the worst part of my day! No nothing changed in my work environment EXCEPT my attitude and I can say that coming in with a smile on my face and doing my job no matter how hard I have to work... I think my days are much smoother! So I am now coming to work with my head held high with a smile on my face making small talk with people I don't like too much and watching the clock on the wall till the end of the day! Lets see how long it can last!!! Ha ha!!!

Well on the Grayson front... this past weekend we spent the weekend at home doing a whole lot of nothing!!! We didn't leave the house till 4 pm on Sunday and that was only cause we were almost out of diapers and wipes!!! Well on Friday night he kept doing stuff with his hands and I just could not figure out what he was doing I thought he was just acting a fool! Then the smart kid brings me his bowl and the fruit puffs and does the hand gesture to me again... and the light bulb went off... duh he is saying more... so I do the sign of eat... and he does it back of eat more... it was hillarious! Well after I gave him the puffs I say thank you to him and what does he do back... thank you mom... what a smart kid I tell you! Well Saturday I watch him a little closer and what do you know he signs... please... thank you.. mom... done... eat... more... water... milk... no... yes... and night! How awesome is that! I have been working on this from the beginning and he started with milk at 6 months... and I let it slide a little after reading in a parents magazine that if you teach a kid to sign they may be delayed in their language skills... but a few months back I picked it up again cause they were working more on them at school... well I guess everything started to click so he is now signing a few things! No he can't have a conversation with anyone but it is a start! Also, he will give a high-five... the cutest thing ever! My kid is not an actor... he will not do ANYTHING on cue... if you want him to wave hi or bye... nope won't do it... if you want to show off how he can walk he will crawl... so we started this whole high-five thing last week... he was waving his hand.. I thought it would be fun to teach him how to give a high-five... so I did it over and over again... well yesterday at school was the first chance we had to show off... I figured him to do his normal of rebelling and not doing anything other than a huge grin... NOPE he actually gave a high-five to 2 different teachers... yay... he is finally doing something on command!!! I am SO proud!!!